Click book covers above to jump to that series

KIWI SPEAK originally began life as Farm Speak, but I quickly realised there were too many beaut sayings that needed to heard, reheard and reminisced upon. Chapters include: Mum Speak, Dad Speak, TV Speak, Retro School Speak, Saturday Sports Speak, Pub Speak and Road Rage Speak.

When I was interviewed on 'Breakfast' (TVNZ) a lot of my mates asked me why host Paul Henry gave me such a hard time. ('He really got stuck into you!' they cried.) Truth is, before the interview started I took the mickey out of my own books, calling them 'pamphlet-esque', due to the size of them, and Henry ran with it. Judge for yourself to see if 'He really got stuck into me!'

Press play to watch TVNZ 'Breakfast' interview

And from the streets of Auckland, 'How to speak like a Kiwi.' Watch out for Indian cricket superstar Rahul Dravid saying, 'If you drink and drive you're a bloody idiot.' Some classic characters here.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

CLICK HERE to buy KIWI SPEAK in NZ at Mighty Ape

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

| KIWI SPEAK | RUGBY SPEAK | CRICKET SPEAK |

Click book covers above to jump to that series

Ever wondered what to yell out at a rugby game? Me too. And that’s how RUGBY SPEAK was born. Chapters include: What to yell at the players; What to yell at the ref; Things which sound rude but aren’t; Things women shouldn’t say.

'New Zealand Woman's Weekly'

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

 Click here for the best (cheapest!) place to buy RUGBY SPEAK

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

| KIWI SPEAK | RUGBY SPEAK | CRICKET SPEAK |

Click book covers above to jump to that series

Ah, cricket, now there’s a sport where you have five days to come up with a funny line. But rarely ever do. If you’ve ever wondered what to yell at the opposition from the comfort of the cheap seats, CRICKET SPEAK is the book for you.

‘Throw him a piano, see if he can play that!’

‘Do you want someone to put a bell on it?’

What to yell at the umpire:

‘You’re missing a good game here, ump!’

‘Whatever they’re paying you, I can match it!’

Things women shouldn’t say:

‘Is this a one-day test?’

‘Why’s it called a stand when you sit in it?’

‘Why’s he wearing a crash helmet?’

'Central Leader'

(left) 'New Zealand Woman's Weekly' and (right) 'Nelson Mail' Cricket Speak reviews

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

CLICK HERE to buy CRICKET SPEAK in NZ at Mighty Ape